Searching For Something More

It has literally been months since I last even looked at this, let alone created a post. I am bad at things like this. So instead of continuing to grade the Unit 6 Math exam I gave my students on Friday I am going to put up a very (I mean very) brief update.

Things seemed liked they sucked for a while. Not necessarily teaching, but life in general. The stresses of a new place, missing friends, poor classroom management, tons of planning, grad school work, money and the feeling of having no life outside of teaching. All of this had a certain ebb and flow, which created a huge lack of consistency in my life. This made things even more difficult.

Yet, the strong survive. Through constant PMA (which I had to get tattooed on my arm as a helpful reminder) and some new happenings, life became a little better. Months ago I would have never have guessed that this combination of events would have created such a challenging experience (inside and outside of teaching). I am still here, still kicking. Things are better in case you were wondering. I recently just got back from a beyond amazing week-long break in Seattle. I have the best friend anyone could ask for. They made it feel as if I never left. I miss them all terribly, which made it hard to leave. Upon arriving back to NY I felt a strong sense of regret from having revisited all the things I loved about life in Seattle. This made for a rough Monday commute to work. Coffee spilling, bus missing, copier jamming and all. At the same time this week has proved to be one of my best weeks at school that I can remember. I felt as if my students have were far more engaged, active and actually learning. This is beyond the greatest feeling in the world to have. The week before break the kids were so out of control I felt as if I had been slammed into a brick wall of desperation. PMA. I worked hard, they worked hard and we had a great week. Parent teacher conferences were Thursday and during one of my meetings I had to tear up a bit. Margely's mother said that she believes so much in her daugther because she has a teacher who believes so much for her. She said that when she told the other women she works with that Margely has a teacher that calls often to tell her how well she is doing they were extremely surprised. Margely's mom said a lot more, and attributed a lot of Margely's success to "such a wonderful, hard working teacher." I'll tell you what, the week before break I thought I was the worst person in the world. These conferences with parents really helped to remind me of the reason why I am here. Why I am at school for 12 hours just to come home to plan for 5 more and then get sleep. These conferences helped to remind me that my students are kids and students, with lives outisde of school. Lives that prove to not be easy. WHAT A GREAT FEELING!

DAMN! Life is good right now. Let this feeling last forever. (At least until the 8pm Sunday night panic....) I'll be sure to update this in another 5 months...